Make preparations for a funeral
Whether a bereavement is sudden or expected, the experience of losing someone is bewildering and painful. St. Mary's helps people come to terms with grief through offering practical and prayerful support which is available to all who live locally. The first task a person needs to do is to contact an undertaker, lists of which can be found in Yellow Pages under Funeral Directors. If you would like the clergy of St. Mary's to take the funeral service, it is often best to contact us before going to make arrangements with the undertaker to make doubly sure we can take the service at the time nominated.
We conduct funeral services in church, if you so wish, or at the cemetery/crematorium. Before the service you would be visited by the vicar or curate, who would talk with you about the life of the person who has died, as a way of building up a picture of them that can be reflected at the service. There would be a choice of hymns, readings, music, poems, prose or tributes put together to celebrate the life of that person. Although the funeral is a sad moment, it is also an unique opportunity to pay tribute to the public and private impact a person has made in their life, a chance to say goodbye with affection and dignity as we entrust them to the care of God through Jesus Christ.
If you would like prayer with someone before, at the point of, or after, death do not hesitate to contact The Churchwarden, 020 8466 6969 or email: admin@stmarys-bromley.org.uk and the Churchwardens will arrange it. Here are some prayers which you might want to pray following a bereavement:
O God, who brought us to birth,
and in whose
arms we die,
in our grief and shock contain and comfort us;
embrace us
with your love,
give us hope in our confusion and grace to let go into new
life;
through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
Father,
You know our
hearts and share our sorrows.
We are hurt by our parting from (name) whom
we loved:
When we are angry at the loss we have sustained,
When we
long for words of comfort,
Yet find them hard to hear,
Turn our grief
to truer living,
Our affliction to firmer hope
In Jesus Christ our
Lord. Amen.
After a short life:
Lord our God,
You give and you take away.
You blessed us through the gift of (name),
Who is now taken from us
And
whose loss we mourn.
Help us, through our tears and pain,
To glimpse
your hand at work
To bring blessing out of grief.
To you be glory for
ever. Amen.
After a sudden death:
God of hope,
We come to you in shock and grief
and confusion of heart.
Help us to find peace in the knowledge
Of your
loving mercy to all your children,
And give us light to guide us out of our
darkness
Into the assurance of your love,
In Jesus Christ our Lord.
Amen.
After a violent death:
Merciful God,
Hear the cries of our grief,
For you know the anguish of our hearts.
It is beyond our
understanding
And more than we can bear.
Accept our prayer
That as
(name) has been released from this world's cruelty
So may he/she be
received into your safe hands and secure love.
We pray that justice may be
done
And that we may treasure the memory of his/her life
More than the
manner of his/her death.
For Christ's sake.Amen.
After a suicide:
Eternal God and Father
Look in mercy on us as
we remember (name) before you.
Let not the manner of his/her death
Cloud the good memories of his/her life.
For (name) the trials of this
world are over
And death is past.
Accept from us all that we feel
Even when words fail;
Deliver us from despair
And give us strength to
meet the days to come
In the faith of Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.
For flowers at the ceremony
Contact: Shelagh Frankham 020 8402 0578
Obtain support from Bromley Community Bereavement Service
We are here to support you through your bereavement by providing a safe place where you can talk in confidence.
We can offer support in several ways:
- On the telephone
- An individual appointment with a support worker at Church House where we work
- A home visit
- In a group
- Through more formal counseling
We are able to offer information and advice. If you feel the above is not what you need do let us know and we will endeavour to suggest something else.
Much of our support is given by trained and supervised volunteer support workers. What you speak of will be confidential to those who work within the service. If you are part of a group you are asked to keep confidential what you hear from others.
BCBS is a registered charity.Our service is free. It is mainly funded through a grant from Bromley Health but also depends on fund raising. Donations are always welcome.
Our experience is that grief is a normal and natural emotion, but each person's way of grieving is unique.
- Be gentle with yourself
- Take time to think, rest and sleep
- Eat properly even though you may not feel like it
- Talk about what has happened and don't be frightened of your feelings
- Remember that tomorrow is another day and it may be a little easier
Fees
Service (in church, cemetery or crematorium) |
£93 |
Burial in churchyard following on from service in church |
£168 |
Burial in churchyard on a separate occasion or without service in church |
£201 |
Burial certificate, if required |
£12 |
Verger |
£30 |
Heating (October to April) |
£55 |
Organist fee |
£85 |
Entry in remembrance book |
£25 |
